By: Chris V Have you ever seen the cover of a magazine? How about the ones with covers of what I call Mary Poppins models- perfect in every way? Now, here’s the big question: have you ever started to compare yourself to those models? I know I have! Not only do we tend to compare ourselves to models, we also tend to compare ourselves to other girls (sometimes girls we don’t even know!) and evaluate how our bodies compare to theirs. According to a survey reported on by CBS, over ninety-seven percent of women struggle with body image and have at least one or more negative thoughts about their body per day. Comparing myself to other girls has, does, and will always continue to make me feel discontent about my body. What about you? This cycle of comparing ourselves and our bodies to other girls is commonly known as the comparison game. We take one look at another girl, think thoughts like “Wow! She has such a slim midsection! I wish I looked like that!” or “She’s so pretty! I wish I had the exact same skin tone as hers!”. Instead of forgetting those thoughts, our female brains file them away for later. When later does come, we go to great lengths to get “the look” at all costs, even going through physical and emotional trauma to try to make our bodies “better” and to fit in with our culture’s definition of beauty. Sound familiar? This way of thinking can be dangerous, not only to our physical and mental health, but also to our spiritual walk with Christ. Physical Health Catastrophe Most girls try to change their physical appearance through different techniques like excessive exercise, plastic surgeries, and refusing to eat. Why? These girls compare themselves to underweight models, who because they are so underweight, can have many health complications (sometimes even leading to death). This can lead to girls developing serious eating disorders, menstrual/pregnancy complications, organ failures, and in extreme cases, even death. Mental Health Meltdown According to a study done on body image in 2019, 57% of young adults feel anxious because of their body image, 10% of women have harmed themselves because they don’t “measure up”, and 13% of adults have experienced suicidal thoughts because of their perceived body image. This is some pretty serious stuff! How did the people taking the survey develop these mental ideals? By comparing their bodies to others and putting their value into their looks! Spiritual Slump When it comes to comparison, the most crucial factor that is detrimentally affected is your spiritual health. Satan uses those little seeds of comparison to plant lies in your life about your worth and value in Christ. Left unchecked, these lies can grow into weeds that not only choke your faith, but can also lead down a road of death and destruction in your physical and mental health. How to Break the Cycle of COMPARISON The first thing that needs to be realized is that you cannot break the comparison cycle on your own. It’s important to talk to your parents and/or any other trusted adult when you’re struggling with comparison, especially if it has led to serious health disorders (e.g. anorexia), but even before that, take the time to talk to God! Pray to him! Tell him how you’re struggling, and ask for help and wisdom in breaking free the cycle of comparison. Another thing is to memorize bible verses about your worth in Christ. As a child of God, you are worth way more than how your hair looks today! (In fact, you’re worth so much to Him, He sent his own Son, Jesus, to die on a cross and rise again to save you from sin and death! Take a look at John 3:16 and Romans 5:8.) A few verses that I love to look at, memorize, and think about when I’m struggling with comparison are:
Ladies, we can easily be burned by comparison in our quest for beauty that ultimately doesn’t last. (You can find out what lasting beauty is by checking out 1 Peter 3:4!) Instead of being stuck in comparison, remember that to God, your worth and value in Him is way more than how your body looks compared to touched-up images. Works CitedEaton, Lynn, and Rossalyn Warren. “How Much Does Poor Body Image Affect Mental Health?” The Guardian, Guardian News and Media, 17 May 2019, www.theguardian.com/society/2019/may/17/poor-body-image-mental-health. “Survey: 97 Percent of Women Have Negative Body Image.” CBS News, CBS Interactive, 2 Mar. 2011, www.cbsnews.com/news/survey-97-percent-of-women-have-negative-body-image/. I'd love to hear from you! Have you ever got caught in the comparison trap? How did you, through Christ, break the cycle? Let me know in the comments below!
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By: Chris V I know tons of girls that wonder if they should find an older Christian woman to help mentor them in their walk with Christ. I've been asked if it's important by other girls my age. Maybe you're wondering the same thing! Thankfully, the Bible talks about mentoring several different times throughout the Old and New Testaments: Psalm 145:4"One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts". PRoverbs 22:6"Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it". Proverbs 27:17"Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another". Titus 2: 3-5"Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled". As you can see, the Bible is clear that older mentors play an important part/role in the Christian life, teaching younger women (us) how to act and how to navigate different areas of life. Finding a mentor is super beneficial! How Can I find a Mentor? It's important to have a mentor, an older Christian woman to help you through your walk with Christ; someone you can ask questions to about something in the Christian life because they've already been through it. I have a mentor, and she is so helpful in helping me through different stages of life while still growing in my faith! Now, maybe you want to find a mentor and don't know how! Think of godly women you know: your mom, your sister, an older friend, or maybe a few ladies at church. Once you have a specific person in mind, pray about it, and if God's giving the go-ahead, ask them if they would be willing to be your spiritual mentor. (Sometimes, the lady will want to pray about it and get back to you later. That's completely fine!) Once you have a mentor, be sure to set a date to meet, whether at a coffee shop, the park, on a phone call, or over Skype! Mentoring is such a wonderful thing, whether you are the mentor or mentee. It's an amazing learning experience, helps you grow in your faith, and helps yo find someone to ask questions to about ever-changing stages in life. For more on mentoring, check out this video done by Girl Defined on mentoring and finding a mentor. I'd love to hear from you! Do you have a mentor? How has she helped you in your walk with Christ? If you don't have a mentor yet, that's okay! Are you going to find an older Christian woman to mentor you, and how are you going to do that? Tell me in the comments below!
By: Chris V I'll be the first to admit that I struggle with rest and the concept of resting. Maybe you do to! Today's culture is all "GO, GO, GO!", with technology constantly ringing, dinging, pining... you get the idea. It's exhausting and oftentimes we struggle to take the time to rest when there's a growing to-do list. However, the Bible makes it clear that rest should be in a Christian's life, as seen below. (Also, if you're struggling with rest, there's several ideas to incorporate rest into your life below!) What Does the bible say about rest? Rest is mentioned a ton in the Bible! The first mention we see of rest is in Genesis 2:2, which says, "By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work". Even God rested! He also tells us that He will give us rest (Exodus 33:14, Matthew 11:28-30). We also see commands to rest throughout the Bible:
Ways to Rest Struggling to find ways to rest throughout your week and in your day-to-day life? Check out some ideas below:
I'd love to hear from you! What are ways you can rest in your daily life? Let me know in the comments below!
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